tags.txt

Yahoo Messenger for Mobile

Don't play in the street - you might get that run down feeling. 
Toothpaste costs more than new teeth. 
BRUSH YOUR TEETH AFTER EVERY MEAL - or use a comb. 
My dentist is painless - he doesn't feel a thing. 
Reality is an illusion caused by lack of alcohol. 
WE DON'T SERVE WOMEN - bring your own.
She was only the bartender's daughter, but she knew how to hold her licker. 
CARROT JUICE IS HARE TONIC.
I don't have a drinking problem - I drink, I fall over. - NO PROBLEM. 
Don't take the piss out of this beer - it needs all the flavour it can get!
Put two cherries in my beer - the doctor says I should eat more fruit!
A GOOD GIRL IS A GOOD GIRL - BUT A BAD GIRL IS BETTER.
My mum says if I'm not in bed by 10.30, I'm to go home. 
Never kiss at the garden gate - love is blind, but the neighbours aint. 
Rugby is a colourful game - you get black and blue all over. 
You need leather balls to play rugby. 
Play rugby - legalise cannibalism!
Life is like a bed of roses - full of pricks. 
A man without a women is like a neck without a pain. 
Help the environment. Recycle your boss.
my reality check just bounced. 
Unable to locate Coffee -- Operator Halted! 
Press any key to continue or any other key to quit 
All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound? 
LISP: Lots of Idiotic Stupid Parenthesis 
Press Ctrl-Alt-Delete to Save 
Recursive, adj.; see Recursive 
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. 
Do Not Attempt to Traverse a Chasm in Two Leaps. 
"DesqView!" ...Gesundheit. 
**FLASH** Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery. 
Not tonight dear.... I have a modem. 
Can I yell "movie" in a crowded firehouse?? 
Help stamp out and abolish repetitive redundancy! 
Easy as 3.14159265358979323846... 
C code. C code run. Run, code, run ... PLEASE! 
How do I set my Laser printer to "Stun"? 
Me hav'em heap trouble. - Tonto the programmer 
A rolling stone gathers momentum. 
To increase speed add lightness 
Cole's Law: thinly sliced cabbage. 
Old Mcdonald had a computer, with EIA I/O. 
Taco Bell Laboratories: where UNIX programmers eat out. 
I'm sorry my Karma ran over your Dogma. 
All that glitters has a high refractive -1. 
Breaking Windows isn't just for kids anymore.... 
Mary had a little RAM- about a MEG or so. 
Eunuchs, the non-gender-specific OS 
One if by LAN, 2 if by C, 3 if by ERR. 
Feet Smell? Nose Run? Hey, you're upside down! 
I/O, I/O, it's off to work we go... 
Talk is cheap - Because supply exceeds demand. 
 A bad day BBSing is better than a good day at work.
 A fool and his money soon becomes a SysOp.
 "Any Moderators here?"   <<BANG>>   "Any more?"
"Not tonight honey...  I have a modem."
A modemer's telephone bill knows no bounds....
 BBSing is terminal.
Bored at 3:00 a.m.?   PSSSTTT - got a modem?
 CRUISING:  19200bps modem and 0.5bps fingers!
Drop your carrier... we have you surrounded!
I believe in The Divine Right of SysOps.
 If money talks, Being a SysOp is pretty quiet!
Users: Keep them dry and don't feed them after midnight.
 Cover me. I'm changing lanes.
Don't Be What You See (as read on Horsetrailer).
Don't drink and park, accidents cause people.
Don't Like My Driving? Dial (800) EAT SHIT
Forget about World Peace... Visualize Using Your Turn Signal!
Friends don't let Friends drive Naked.
Hang up and drive.
Horn broken, watch for finger.
I'd rather be skiing
I'm just driving this way to piss you off.
  *   I Brake for No Apparent Reason.
  *   I May Be Slow, But I'm Ahead of You.
  *   I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather...Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
  *   If you can read this, you're too close to my car.
  *   If you don't like my driving, get off the sidewalk!
  *   Keep honking, I'm reloading.
  *   My other car is a stealth bomber.
  *   Stop reading this and watch where you're driving.
  *   Watch My Ass, Not Hers!
  *   90% of computer problems are located between the keyboard and the chair.
  *   1024x768x256... Sounds like one MEAN woman!
  *   # of Pentiums required to screw in lightbulb = .999999999
  *   "Home" is where the computer is plugged in!
  *   (A)bort  (R)etry  (F)ail  (S)how furry GIF
  *   (A)bort  (R)etry  (I)nfluence with large hammer
  *   (A)bort  (R)etry  (S)ell it
  *   Computer (com-pyoo-ter) n.-Incredibly fast idiot!
  *   Computers run on smoke. If it leaks out they won't work.
  *   ERROR:  CPU not found
  *   GUI:  Grab the User In-the-face
  *   Hi, my name is Annie Key.   Please don't hit me!
  *   I wish life had a scroll-back buffer.....
  *   IBM - Making Tomorrow's Mistakes Today!!!
  *   IBM = Ice Box Machines
  *   I parked my harddisk - and got a ticket!
  *   Old MacDonald had a computer, with EIA I/O...
  *   (Unregistered) <-- World's most popular tagline.
  *   A clean, neat, desk is a sign of a sick mind.
  *   A day without sunshine is like night.
  *   A Dirty Mind is a Terrible Thing to Waste.
  *   A mind is a terrible thing to...  I forget...
  *   Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.
  *   Despite the cost of living, it remains popular.
  *   Don't take life seriously - won't get out alive!
  *   Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.
  *   I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
  *   I'm on a 30 day diet. So far I've lost about two weeks...
  *   I.R.S: We've got what it takes to take what you've got.
  *   Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.
  *   The earth is 98% full. Please delete anyone you can.
  *   Success comes in a can.  Failure comes in a can not.
  *   Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear.
  *   We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.
  *   If all goes well, you've overlooked something!
  *   If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
  *   If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.
  *   If evolution were a fact then cats would use can openers.
  *   If it works, rip it apart and find out why!
  *   If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster...
  *   If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?
  *   If woman's place is in the home, why am I always in my car?
  *   Does killing time harm eternity?
  *   Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
  *   Help wanted telepath: you know where to apply
  *   Reality? That's where the pizza delivery guy comes from!
  *   What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
  *   Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
  *   Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?
  *   Why don't you ever see the headline "Physic Wins Lottery"?
  *   Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly?
  *   Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?
  *   43.3% of statistics are meaningless!
  *   A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
  *   ...and that is how we know the Earth is banana-shaped.
  *   Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
  *   Atomic Bomb - Made in America, Tested in Japan.
  *   Black holes suck.
  *   Blind people don't bungee jump; it scares the dog too much.
  *   Caffeine - the ultimate debugging tool.
  *   "Conclusion":  The place where you got tired of thinking.
  *   Dyslexics of the world - untie!!!
  *   Did you know that SATAN is an anagram for SANTA?
  *   Difference between men & boys is the price of their toys.
  *   Don't make me mad. I haven't any place left in my backyard to bury more bodies.
  *   Drilling for oil is boring.
  *   Governments, like diapers, must be changed often and for the same reasons.
  *   Hard work has a future. Laziness pays off now.
  *   Happiness is a belt-fed weapon.
  *   HELP, HELP The KOTEX is on fire!  TAMP ON it!!
  *   How do you know it's summer in Seattle? The rain's warmer.
  *   I don't care if I am a lemming. I'm NOT going!
  *   I don't do jogging, it makes my beer all foamy.
  *   I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
  *   I have gone out to find myself. If I return before I get back, please ask me to wait.
  *   I'm in search of myself.  Have you seen me anywhere?
  *   I'm not as think as you stoned I am.
  *   I'm out of my mind just now, but please leave a message.
  *   I'm their leader, which way did they go?
  *   Intel used "Pentium" in stead of "586" since 486 + 100 equals 585.999983605
  *   One thing nuclear scientists fear;   "Oops."
  *   Real anarchists play chess without the kings.
  *   Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
  *   There are only three types of people in this world, people who can count and people who can't.
  *   Today is cancelled due to lack of interest!
  *   The universe is laughing behind your back.
  *   Breakin the Law, Breakin the Law, huh huhh.
  *   Hey Beavis, you know we could like, go to jail for this?
  *   Hey Butthead, change it or kill me.
  *   Hey Butthead. Does this suck?
  *   It's over my head. (Beavis) It's under my butt (Butthead).
  *   Manly yes, but Beavis likes it too!
  *   Settle down Beavis.
  *   Air-conditioned environment... do NOT open Windows.
  *   Anti-Mickeys of the world: Unite
  *   Best way to accelerate Windows? Throw it harder...!
  *   Breaking Windows isn't just for kids anymore....
  *   Can I call you Ms. Dos?
  *   DEVICEHIGH: Your device driver on drugs.
  *   Difference between a virus & windows? Viruses never fail.
  *   DisneyLand: A people trap operated by a mouse.
  *   Does Microsoft mean small and limp?
  *   ERROR 0143: Unable to exit Windows. Try the door.
  *   Ever noticed how fast Windows runs? Neither did I.
  *   Friends don't let friends use WinME.
  *   Have time to waste? Get Microsoft Windows 98!
  *   He who laughs last is probably not using Windows.
  *   I used to have a life, then I got Windows 2000.
  *   In a world without walls and fences, who needs windows and gates?
  *   We are Microsoft. Resistance Is Futile. You Will Be Assimilated.
  *   Ask me about microwaving cats for fun and profit.
  *   Cats may have 9 lives, but I have 10 bullets.
  *   catalog (n.) - firewood for cats.
  *   Does a radioactive cat have 18 half-lives?
  *   Here kitty, kitty. Play with this nice electric cord.
  *   I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
  *   I love cats... they taste just like chicken.
  *   What do Chickens think we taste like?
  *   .ASM programmers drive stick shifts.
  *   COMPUTER PROGRAMMER WANTED
        -- Some Assembly Required.
  *   If it wasn't for C, we would be using BASI, PASAL and OBOL!
  *   I've had BETA days ... and nights!!!
  *   COBOL can be cured with early detection!
  *   COBOL programmers understand why women hate periods.
  *   COBOL.....  (C)ompiles (O)nly (B)ecause (O)f (L)uck
  *   Gentlemen:  Start your debuggers...
  *   Never test for an error you don't know how to handle.
  *   A fate worse than death:  To be married alive.
  *   Adopt a teenager while he still knows everything.
  *   Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
  *   Bigamy is one wife too many.  Monogamy is the same thing.
  *   Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.
  *   Madness is hereditary, and you'll get it from your children.
  *   I got a gun for my wife; pretty good trade - huh
  *   I got rid of the kids; the dog was allergic to them.
  *   Love may be blind but marriage is a real eye-opener.
  *   Sometimes I wake up grumpy; Other times I let her sleep
  *   667:   Satan's neighbor...
  *   ...and on the 8th day God said: Well, Murphy, now it's your turn.
  *   As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.
  *   Noah saved animals from the flood by arcing them!
  *   Lord save me from your followers.
  *   Jesus died for my sins and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.
  *   Jesus loves you... everyone else thinks you're an asshole.
  *   Jesus is coming, everyone look busy.
  *   Are you a Klingon, or is that a turtle on your head?
  *   Beam me up Scotty. This isn't the men's room.
  *   Captain please, not in front of the Klingons.
  *   Damnit Jim, she's dead! Get off of her!
  *   Damnit, Jim, I'm a doctor, not a tagline. (Dr. McCoy)
  *   Energize! said Picard and the pink bunny appeared...
  *   He's ALIVE, Jim. Where did I go wrong?
  *   He's dead, Jim. Cripes! Only 73$ & a box of Tic Tacs!
  *   He's dead, Jim. Funny-looking phaser... It says 'CNN'.
  *   He's dead, Jim. Poor devil. Grab his pitch fork, too.
  *   He's dead Jim, Spock took his tricorder, I got his spleen.
  *   He's dead, Jim. That helmet's a pretty blue.
  *   She's dead, Jim. Should we bury her or have some fun?
  *   She's dead, Jim. Still warm, though. Flip ya for her?
  *   The UART's won't take this speed, Captain
  *   Very funny, Scotty. Now beam up my clothes.