📄 telemarket_torture.ael2
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}context telemarket-poli-South { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-SocWork { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-SocLab { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-SocEq { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-SocAct { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-SocPart { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-Revol { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-Ref { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-Prohib { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-PeaceFree { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-NewUn { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-New { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-NatLaw { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-Light { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-Liber { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-Labor { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-IndAm { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-Independence { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-Greens { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-Green { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-Grassroot { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-FreedSoc { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-FamVal { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-Constit { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-Communist { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-CFP { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-AmRef { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}// BAD DESIGN: Putting in infinite loops in the menus, whether by design or mistake is not nice!context telemarket-poli-Pot { s => { begin: goto telemarket-political|s|begin; // will the Pot Party Guys even notice an infinite loop? }}context telemarket-poli-AmNaz { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-AmInd { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-AmHer { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-American { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-poli-Am1st { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}context telemarket-pollster { s => { begin: Playback(telemark-poll-intro); // I'm sorry-- We are just not available for doing any polling at the moment. So, // please remove us from your list. goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; } t => goto telemarket|s|begin; i => goto telemarket|s|begin; o => goto telemarket|s|begin;}context telemarket-research { s => { begin: Playback(telemark-research-intro); // I'd like to say I'd love to help you with your market survey, but that would be a complete // and total lie. I am not interested in helping you with Market Surveys. // // Please remove me from your call list. It just doesn't pay enough. But Thank you. goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; } t => goto telemarket|s|begin; i => goto telemarket|s|begin; o => goto telemarket|s|begin;}context telemarket-magazine { s => { begin: Playback(telemark-mag-choices); // If you are calling to see if I would like a NEW free subscription // to your magazine or newsletter, please dial 1. // If you are calling to see if I want to Renew an existing subscription, please dial 2. // If you are representing some publisher, and want my opinion about something, or are doing // some kind of survey, please dial 3. // If you are calling to verify that some previous caller actually called me, and the // verification information is correct, please dial 4. // and if your call purpose doesn't match any of the above, please dial 5. } 1 => goto telemark-mag-new|s|begin; 2 => goto telemark-mag-renew|s|begin; 3 => goto telemark-mag-survey|s|begin; 4 => goto telemark-mag-verify|s|begin; 5 => goto telemark-mag-other|s|begin; t => goto telemarket|s|begin; i => goto telemarket|s|begin; o => goto telemarket|s|begin;}context telemark-mag-new { s => { begin: Playback(telemark-mag-new); // I'm sorry, I'm maxed out, and the answer is NO. // If you really think I'd LOVE to add your publication to the pile I already get, // Send something via the post. Don't call me. // Thank you. bye. Hangup(); } t => goto telemarket|s|begin; i => goto telemarket|s|begin; o => goto telemarket|s|begin;}context telemark-mag-renew { s => { begin: Playback(telemark-mag-renew); // So, you want to see if I want to Renew, do you? The answer is most likely "YES". // // But, I will not answer a long list of questions over the phone. Send such // categorization info via the post, and stop bothering me over the phone, // if this is what you want. // Do you need verification information? Normally I opt out of such nonsense, if possible. // If not, use whatever of the following you can: // My birth month is October. // My birthplace is Kigali, in Rwanda, in Afica. // My eye color is orange. // All of these are wonderfully false, but I use them regularly for such purposes. Thank you. Hangup(); } t => goto telemarket|s|begin; i => goto telemarket|s|begin; o => goto telemarket|s|begin;}context telemark-mag-survey { s => { begin: Playback(telemark-mag-survey); // Sorry, I don't have time to answer survey or opinion questions. Find someone // else to help build your marketing database, I guess. Good Luck. Hangup(); } t => goto telemarket|s|begin; i => goto telemarket|s|begin; o => goto telemarket|s|begin;}context telemark-mag-verify { s => { begin: Playback(telemark-mag-verify); // If you are calling to verify that your own agents aren't ripping you off, // sorry, I can't help you. I opt out whenever I can, mainly because I'm not // paid enough for this kind of thing. I always lie, and I can't remember // what I might have said. Sorry. Goodbye. Hangup(); } t => goto telemarket|s|begin; i => goto telemarket|s|begin; o => goto telemarket|s|begin;}context telemark-mag-other { s => { begin: goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; }}// BAD DESIGN: Is it entrapment, when you lure telemarketers to reveal their contact information,// Just so you can report them to the FTC/FCC? If it is, isn't it unethical for them// to hide their CID (via Anonymous, usually), to hide their identities from the public?// BTW -- What telemarketer would be stupid enough to fall for this? I'll bet not a single one!// For that matter, what telemarketer will be stupid enough to even enter any of this? I'll bet not a single one!// (but it was fun messing around).context telemarket-commercial { s => { begin: Playback(telemark-comm-intro); // Script: Please leave your name, organization, and phone number, plus // a short description of the purpose of your call, at the prompt. // We will do our best to respond to your call! And, in the mean time, // do not forget to add us to your no-call list! Voicemail(u82); goto telemarket-sorry|s|begin; } t => goto telemarket|s|begin; i => goto telemarket|s|begin; o => goto telemarket|s|begin;}context telemarket-other { s => { begin: Playback(telemark-other-intro); // Please review the previous menu options, and see if you really don't // fit in one of the previous categories. // If you do not, go ahead, and call me again, and let me know what category // I should have included in the above list. I appreciate this. Thank you much! Hangup(); } t => goto telemarket|s|begin; i => goto telemarket|s|begin; o => goto telemarket|s|begin;}
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