limerick

早期freebsd实现

A bad little girl in Madrid,
A most reprehensible kid,
	Told her Tante Louise
	That her cunt smelled like cheese,
And the worst of it was that it did!
%
A bather whose clothing was strewed
By breezes that left her quite nude,
	Saw a man come along
	And, unless I am wrong,
You expected this line to be lewd.
%
A bather whose clothing was strewed
By breezes that left her quite nude,
	Saw a man come along
	And, unless I'm quite wrong,
You expected this line to be lewd.
%
A beat schizophrenic said, "Me?
I am not I, I'm a tree."
	But another, more sane,
	Shouted, "I'm a great dane "
And covered his pants leg with pee.
%
A beat schizophrenic said, "Me?
I am not I, I'm a tree."
	But another, more sane,
	Shouted, "I'm a Great Dane!"
And covered his pants leg with pee.
%
A beautiful belle of Del Norte
Is reckoned disdainful and haughrty
	Because during the day
	She says: "Boys, keep away!"
But she fucks in the gloaming like forty.
%
A beautiful lady named Psyche
Is loved by a fellow named Ikey.
	One thing about Ike
	The lady can't like
Is his prick, which is dreadfully spikey.
%
A beetling young woman named Pridgets
Had a violent abhorrence of midgets;
	Off the end of a wharf
	She once pushed a dwarf
Whose truncation reduced her to fidgets.
		-- Edward Gorey
%
A big-bosomed Bunny named Gression
Sold cigars at a key-club concession.
	When she swiveled about
	Even strong men cried out,
For her costume did not keep her flesh in.
%
A bobby of Nottingham Junction
Whose organ had long ceased to function
	Deceived his good wife
	For the rest of her life
With the aid of his constable's truncheon.
%
A broken-down harlot named Tupps
Was heard to confess in her cups:
	"The height of my folly
	Was diddling a collie-
But I got a nice price for the pups."
%
A broken-down harlot named Tupps
Was heard to confess in her cups:
	"The height of my folly
	Was fucking a collie --
But I got a nice price for the pups."
%
A burleyque dancer, a pip
Named Virginia, could peel in a zip;
	But she read science fiction
	And died of constriction
Attempting a Moebius strip.
		-- Cyril Kornbluth, "The Unfortunate Topology"
%
A busy young lady named Gloria
Was had by Sir Gerald du Maurier
	And then by six men,
	Sir Gerald again,
And the band at the Waldorf-Astoria.
%
A cabin boy on an old clipper
Grew steadily flipper and flipper.
	He plugged up his ass
	With fragments of glass
And thus circumcised his old skipper.
%
A cautious young fellow named Lodge
Had seatbelts installed in his Dodge.
	When his date was strapped in,
	He committed a sin,
Without even leaving his grodge.
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A cautious young fellow named Lodge,
Had seatbelts installed in his Dodge.
	With his date all strapped in
	He committed a sin
Without even leaving the garage.
		-- "A Boy and His Dog"
%
A cautious young fellow named Tunney
Had a whang that was worth any money.
	When eased in half-way,
	The girl's sigh made him say,
"Why the sigh?"  "For the rest of it, honey."
%
A certain young man, it was noted,
Went about in the heat thickly-coated;
	He said, "You may scoff,
	But I shan't take it off;
Underneath I am horribly bloated."
		-- Edward Gorey
%
A certain young person of Ghent,
Uncertain if lady or gent,
	Shows his organs at large
	For a small handling charge
To assist him in paying the rent.
%
A certain young sheik of Algiers
Said to his harem, "My dears,
	Though you may think it odd of me,
	I'm tired of just sodomy
Let's try straight fucking."  (loud cheers!)
%
A chap down in Oklahoma
Had a cock that could sing La Paloma,
	But the sweetness of pitch
	Couldn't put off the hitch
Of impotence, size and aroma.
%
A charmer from old Amarillo,
Sick of finding strange heads on her pillow,
	Decided one day
	That to keep men away
She would stuff up her crevice with Brillo.
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A chippy who worked in Black Bluff
Had a pussy as large as a muff.
	It had room for both hands
	And some intimate glands,
And was soft as a little duck's fluff.
%
A clerical student named Pryne
Through pain sought to reach the divine:
	He wore a hair shirt,
	Quite often ate dirt,
And bathed every Friday in brine.
		-- Edward Gorey
%
A clever young man named Eugene
Invented a jack-off machine.
	On the twenty-third stroke
	The fuckin' thing broke
And beat both his balls to a creame.
%
A clever young man named Eugene
Invented a jack-off machine.
	On the twenty-third stroke
	The goddam thing broke
And beat both his balls to a creame.
%
A cocksucking steno named Beeman
Remarked as she swallowed my semen :
	"On my minuscule salary
	 I must watch every calorie,
So I get `ahead' eating you he-men!"
%
A computer called Illiac4
Had a rather tough bug in its core.
	It chewed up its cards
	And spewed yards and yards
Of illegible tape on the floor.
%
A computer, to print out a fact,
Will divide, multiply, and subtract.
	But this output can be
	No more than debris,
If the input was short of exact.
		-- Gigo
%
A contortionist hailing from Lynch
Used to rent out his tool by the inch.
	A foot cost a quid --
	He could and he did
Stretch it to three in a pinch.
%
A corpulent maiden named Kroll
Had a notion exceedingly droll:
	At a masquerade ball,
	Dressed in nothing at all,
She backed in as a Parker House roll.
%
A couple was fishing near Clombe
When the maid began looking quite glum,
	And said, "Bother the fish!
	I'd rather coish!"
Which they did -- which was why they had come.
%
A cowhand way out in Seattle
Had a dooflicker flat as a paddle.
	He said, "No, I can't fuck
	A lamb or a duck,
But golly! it just fits the cattle."
%
A crusader's wife slipped from the garrison
And had an affair with a Saracen.
	She was not oversexed,
	Or jealous or vexed,
She just wanted to make a comparison.
%
A CS student named Lin
Had a prick the size of a pin
	It was no good for girls
	But just great for squirrels
Who squealed with delight with it in.
%
A cute little twerp from Samoa
Had a cock of one inch and no moa.
	It was good for keyholes
	And debutantes' peeholes
But not worth a damn on a whoa.
%
A daredevil skater named Lowe,
Leaps barrels arranged in the snow,
	But is proudest of doing,
	Some incredible screwing,
Since he's jumped thirteen girls in a row!
%
A deep-throated virgin named Netty
Was sucking a cock on the jetty.
	She said, "It tastes nice,
	Much better than rice,
Though not quite as good as spaghetti."
%
A delighted, incredulous bride
Remarked to her groom at her side :
	"I never could quite
	 Believe till tonight
Our anatomies would coincide."
%
A dentist, young doctor Malone,
Got a charming girl patient alone,
	And, in his depravity,
	Filled the wrong cavity.
God, how his practice has grown.
%
A despairing old landlord named Fyfe,
With a frigid and quarrelsome wife,
	Let his third-story front,
	To a willing young cunt,
Who supplied him a new lease on life!
%
A desperate spinster from Clare
Once knelt in the moonlight all bare,
	And prayed to her God
	For a romp on the sod--
'Twas a passerby answered her prayer.
%
A distinguished professor from Swarthmore
Got along with a sexy young sophomore.
	As quick as a glance
	He stripped off his pants,
But he found that the sophomore'd got off more.
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A doctoral student from Buckingham
Wrote his thesis on cunts and on fucking'em.
	But a dropout from paree
	Taught him Gamahuchee
- so he added a footnote on sucking 'em.
%
A doctoral student from Buckingham
Wrote his thesis on cunts and on fucking'em.
	But a dropout from paree
	Taught him Gamahuchee
So he added a footnote on sucking 'em.
%
A do-it-yourselfer named Alice,
Used a dynamite stick for a phallus.
	She blew her vagina
	To South Carolina,
And her tits landed somewhere in Dallas.

A cute friend of hers, Fanny Hill,
Used two dynamite sticks for a dil.
	They found her vagina,
	In South Carolina,
And part of her ass in Brazil.
%
A dolly in Dallas named Alice,
Whose overworked sex is all callous,
	Wore the foreskin away
	On uncircumcised Ray,
Through exuberance, tightness, and malice.
%
A dreary young bank clerk named Fennis
Wished to foster an aura of menace;
	To make people afraid
	He wore gloves of grey suede
And white footgear intended for tennis.
		-- Edward Gorey
%
A dreary young bank clerk named Fennis
Wished to foster an aura of menace.
	To make people afraid
	He wore gloves of grey suede
And white footgear intended for tennis.
		-- Edward Gorey, "Amphigorey"
%
A dulcet-voiced callgirl named Shedd,
Who's cultured, well-spoken, well-bred,
	Had achieved some reknown
	For her tone going down--
There's a nice civil tongue in her head.
%
A fair-haired young damsel named Grace
Thought it very, very foolish to place
	Her hand on your cock
	When it turned hard as rock,
For fear it would explode in your face.
%
A farmer I know named O'Doole
Had a long and incredible tool.
	He can use it to plow,
	Or to diddle a cow,
Or just as a cue-stick at pool.
%
A fellatrix's healthful condition
Proved the value of spunk as nutrition.
	Her remarkable diet
	(I suggest that you try it)
Was only her clients' emission.
%
A fellow whose surname was Hunt
Trained his cock to perform a slick stunt:
	This versatile spout
	Could be turned inside out,
Like a glove, and be used as a cunt.
%
A fisherman off of Cape Cod
Said, "I'll bugger that tuna, by God!"
	But the high-minded fish
	Resented his wish,
And nimbly swam off with his rod.
%
A foolish geologist from Kissen
Just didn't know what he was missin',
	By studying rock
	And neglecting his cock,
And using it merely for pissin'.
%
A Frenchman who lived in Alsace
Had sex with a virgin named Grace.
	When he popped her cherry,
	She made things hairy
By bleeding all over his face.
%
A frustrated lady named Alice
Used a dynamite stick for a phallus.
	They found her vagina
	In North Carolina
And bits of her tits were in Dallas.
%
A gay young prince from Morocco
Made love in a manner rococco.
	He painted his penis
	To resemble a venus
And flavored his semen with cocoa.
%
A geneticist living in Delft
Scientifically played with himself,
	And when he was done
	He labled it: son,
And filed him away on a shelf.
%
A geneticist living in Delft
Scientifically played with himself,
	And when he was done
	He labled it: son,
And filed him away on a shelf.
A gentleman, otherwise meek,
Detested with passion the leek;
	When offered one out
	He dealt such a clout
To the maid, she was down for a week.
		-- Edward Gorey
%
A gentleman, otherwise meek,
Detested with passion the leek;
	When offered one out
	He dealt such a clout
To the maid, she was down for a week.
		-- Edward Gorey
%
A german composer named Bruckner
Remarked to a lady while fuckener :
	"Less lento, my dear,
	 With your cute little rear;
I like a hot presto when muckener!"
%
A gift was delivered to Laura
From a cousin who lived in Gomorrah;
	Wrapped in tissue and crepe,
	It was peeled, like a grape,
And emitted a pale, greenish aura.
		-- Edward Gorey
%
A gifted young fellow from Sparta
Was widely renowned as a farta'.
	He could fart anything
	From "Of Thee I Sing,"
To Beethoven's "Moonlight Sonata."
%
A girl camper once had an affair
With a fellow all covered with hair.
	When she gave him his hat
	She realized that
She'd been had by Smokey the Bear.
%
A girl of the Enterprise crew
Refused every offer to screw.
	But a Vulcan named Spock
	Crawled under her smock,
And now she is eating for two.
%
A girl of uncertain nativity
Had an ass of extreme sensitivity
	While she sat on the lap
	Of a German or Jap,
She could sense Fifth Column activity.
%
A graduate student named Zac
Was said to be great in the sack.
	An inch of his boner
	Put girls in a coma
And two gave them epileptic attacks.
%
A graduate student named Zac
Was said to be great in the sack.
	An inch of his boner 
	Put girls in a coma
And two gave them epileptic attacks.
%
A greedy young lady from Sidney
Liked it in up to her kidney,
	Till a man from Quebec
	Shoved it up to her neck--
He really diddled her, didn' he?
%
A green-thumbed young farmer from Leeds
Once swallowed a package of seeds.
	In a month, his ass
	Was covered with grass
And his balls were grown over with weeds.
%
A guest in a household quite charmless
Was informed its eccentric was harmless:
	"If you're caught unawares
	At the head of the stairs,
Just remember, he's eyeless and armless."
		-- Edward Gorey
%
A habit depraved and unsavory
Held the bishop of Bingham in slavery
	Midst screeches and howls
	He deflowered young owls
Which he kept in an underground aviary
%
A habit obscene and bizarre,
Has taken a-hold of papa.
	He brings home young camels
	And other odd mammals,
And gives them a go at mama.
%
A habit obscene and unsavory,
Holds a CS professor in slavery.
	With maniacal howls,
	He deflowers young owls,
That he keeps in an underground aviary.
%
A hacker who screwed a mag tape
Was caught and convicted of rape.
	To jail he did go,
	From which, to his woe
He couldn't get out with ESC.
%
A hacker-turned-pervert named Fisk
Made love to the drive of his disk.
	The thing circumsized him,