fortunes

早期freebsd实现

All power corrupts, but we need electricity.
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All programmers are playwrights and all computers are lousy actors.
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All progress is based upon a universal innate desire on the part of
every organism to live beyond its income.
		-- Samuel Butler
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All science is either physics or stamp collecting.
		-- E. Rutherford
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"All snakes who wish to remain in Ireland will please raise their right
hands."
		-- Saint Patrick
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All syllogisms have three parts, therefore this is not a syllogism.
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All the big corporations depreciate their possessions, and you can,
too, provided you use them for business purposes.  For example, if you
subscribe to the Wall Street Journal, a business-related newspaper, you
can deduct the cost of your house, because, in the words of U.S.
Supreme Court Chief Justice Warren Burger in a landmark 1979 tax
decision: "Where else are you going to read the paper?  Outside?  What
if it rains?"
		-- Dave Barry, "Sweating Out Taxes"
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"... all the modern inconveniences ..."
		-- Mark Twain
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All the passions make us commit faults; love makes us commit the most
ridiculous ones.
		-- La Rochefoucauld
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All the taxes paid over a lifetime by the average American are spent by
the government in less than a second.
		-- Jim Fiebig
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All the world's a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.
		-- Sean O'Casey
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All the world's a VAX,
And all the coders merely butchers;
They have their exits and their entrails;
And one int in his time plays many widths,
His sizeof being _N bytes.  At first the infant,
Mewling and puking in the Regent's arms.
And then the whining schoolboy, with his Sun,
And shining morning face, creeping like slug
Unwillingly to school.
		-- A Very Annoyed PDP-11
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All theoretical chemistry is really physics;
and all theoretical chemists know it.
		-- Richard P. Feynman
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All things are possible, except skiing thru a revolving door.
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All this wheeling and dealing around, why, it isn't for money, it's for
fun.  Money's just the way we keep score.
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All true wisdom is found on T-shirts.
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All wars are civil wars, because all men are brothers ... Each one owes
infinitely more to the human race than to the particular country in
which he was born.
		-- Francois Fenelon
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Alliance, n.:
	In international politics, the union of two thieves who have
their hands so deeply inserted in each other's pocket that they cannot
separately plunder a third.
		-- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
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Alone, adj.:
	In bad company.
		-- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
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Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight
Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.
		-- Dave Barry
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Although the moon is smaller than the earth, it is farther away.
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Although we modern persons tend to take our electric lights, radios,
mixers, etc., for granted, hundreds of years ago people did not have
any of these things, which is just as well because there was no place
to plug them in.  Then along came the first Electrical Pioneer,
Benjamin Franklin, who flew a kite in a lighting storm and received a
serious electrical shock.  This proved that lighting was powered by the
same force as carpets, but it also damaged Franklin's brain so severely
that he started speaking only in incomprehensible maxims, such as "A
penny saved is a penny earned."  Eventually he had to be given a job
running the post office.
		-- Dave Barry, "What is Electricity?"
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Although written many years ago, Lady Chatterley's Lover has just been
reissued by the Grove Press, and this pictorial account of the
day-to-day life of an English gamekeeper is full of considerable
interest to outdoor minded readers, as it contains many passages on
pheasant-raising, the apprehending of poachers, ways to control vermin,
and other chores and duties of the professional gamekeeper.
Unfortunately, one is obliged to wade through many pages of extraneous
material in order to discover and savour those sidelights on the
management of a midland shooting estate, and in this reviewer's opinion
the book cannot take the place of J. R. Miller's "Practical
Gamekeeping."
		-- Ed Zern, "Field and Stream" (Nov. 1959)
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Always borrow money from a pessimist; he doesn't expect to be paid
back.
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Always remember that you are unique.  Just like everyone else.
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"Always try to do things in chronological order; it's less confusing
that way."
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Am I ranting?  I hope so.  My ranting gets raves.
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		AMAZING BUT TRUE ...

If all the salmon caught in Canada in one year were laid end to end
across the Sahara Desert, the smell would be absolutely awful.
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		AMAZING BUT TRUE ...

There is so much sand in Northern Africa that if it were spread out it
would completely cover the Sahara Desert.
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Ambidextrous, adj.:
	Able to pick with equal skill a right-hand pocket or a left.
		-- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy.
		-- Charlie McCarthy
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America may be unique in being a country which has leapt from barbarism
to decadence without touching civilization.
		-- John O'Hara
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America was discovered by Amerigo Vespucci and was named after him,
until people got tired of living in a place called "Vespuccia" and
changed its name to "America".
		-- Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"
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American business long ago gave up on demanding that prospective
employees be honest and hardworking.  It has even stopped hoping for
employees who are educated enough that they can tell the difference
between the men's room and the women's room without having little
pictures on the doors.
		-- Dave Barry, "Urine Trouble, Mister"
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"Amnesia used to be my favorite word, but then I forgot it."
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An age is called Dark not because the light fails to shine, but because
people refuse to see it.
		-- James Michener, "Space"
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An American's a person who isn't afraid to criticize the President but
is always polite to traffic cops.
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"An anthropologist at Tulane has just come back from a field trip to
New Guinea with reports of a tribe so primitive that they have Tide but
not new Tide with lemon-fresh Borax."
		-- David Letterman
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An apple every eight hours will keep three doctors away.
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	An architect's first work is apt to be spare and clean.  He
knows he doesn't know what he's doing, so he does it carefully and with
great restraint.
	As he designs the first work, frill after frill and
embellishment after embellishment occur to him.  These get stored away
to be used "next time".  Sooner or later the first system is finished,
and the architect, with firm confidence and a demonstrated mastery of
that class of systems, is ready to build a second system.
	This second is the most dangerous system a man ever designs.
When he does his third and later ones, his prior experiences will
confirm each other as to the general characteristics of such systems,
and their differences will identify those parts of his experience that
are particular and not generalizable.
	The general tendency is to over-design the second system, using
all the ideas and frills that were cautiously sidetracked on the first
one.  The result, as Ovid says, is a "big pile".
		-- Frederick Brooks, "The Mythical Man Month"
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An artist should be fit for the best society and keep out of it.
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An attorney was defending his client against a charge of first-degree
murder.  "Your Honor, my client is accused of stuffing his lover's
mutilated body into a suitcase and heading for the Mexican border.
Just north of Tijuana a cop spotted her hand sticking out of the
suitcase.  Now, I would like to stress that my client is *not* a
murderer.  A sloppy packer, maybe..."
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An authority is a person who can tell you more about something than you
really care to know.
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An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.
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An elephant is a mouse with an operating system.
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An English judge, growing weary of the barrister's long-winded
summation, leaned over the bench and remarked, "I've heard your
arguments, Sir Geoffrey, and I'm none the wiser!"  Sir Geoffrey
responded, "That may be, Milord, but at least you're better informed!"
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An Englishman never enjoys himself, except for a noble purpose.
		-- A. P. Herbert
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An excellence-oriented '80s male does not wear a regular watch.  He
wears a Rolex watch, because it weighs nearly six pounds and is
advertised only in excellence-oriented publications such as Fortune and
Rich Protestant Golfer Magazine.  The advertisements are written in
incomplete sentences, which is how advertising copywriters denote
excellence:

"The Rolex Hyperion.  An elegant new standard in quality excellence and
discriminating handcraftsmanship.  For the individual who is truly able
to discriminate with regard to excellent quality standards of crafting
things by hand.  Fabricated of 100 percent 24-karat gold.  No watch
parts or anything.  Just a great big chunk on your wrist.  Truly a
timeless statement.  For the individual who is very secure.  Who
doesn't need to be reminded all the time that he is very successful.
Much more successful than the people who laughed at him in high
school.  Because of his acne.  People who are probably nowhere near as
successful as he is now.  Maybe he'll go to his 20th reunion, and
they'll see his Rolex Hyperion.  Hahahahahahahahaha."
		-- Dave Barry, "In Search of Excellence"
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An exotic journey in downtown Newark is in your future.
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"... an experienced, industrious, ambitious, and often quite often
picturesque liar."
		-- Mark Twain
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An idea is an eye given by God for the seeing of God.  Some of these
eyes we cannot bear to look out of, we blind them as quickly as
possible.
		-- Russell Hoban, "Pilgermann"
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An idea is not responsible for the people who believe in it.
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	An old Jewish man reads about Einstein's theory of relativity
in the newspaper and asks his scientist grandson to explain it to him.
	"Well, zayda, it's sort of like this.  Einstein says that if
you're having your teeth drilled without Novocain, a minute seems like
an hour.  But if you're sitting with a beautiful woman on your lap, an
hour seems like a minute."
	The old man considers this profound bit of thinking for a
moment and says, "And from this he makes a living?"
		-- Arthur Naiman, "Every Goy's Guide to Yiddish"
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"An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of purge."
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Anarchy may not be the best form of government, but it's better than no
government at all.
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And as we stand on the edge of darkness
Let our chant fill the void
That others may know

	In the land of the night
	The ship of the sun
	Is drawn by
	The grateful dead.

		-- Tibetan "Book of the Dead," ca. 4000 BC.
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... and furthermore ... I don't like your trousers.
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And I heard Jeff exclaim,
As they strolled out of sight,
"Merry Christmas to all --
You take credit cards, right?"
		-- "Outsiders" comic
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... And malt does more than Milton can
To justify God's ways to man
		-- A. E. Housman
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And on the seventh day, He exited from append mode.
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"... And remember: if you don't like the news, go out and make some of
your own."
        	-- "Scoop" Nisker, KFOG radio reporter
		   Preposterous Words
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And so, men, we can see that human skin is an even more complex and
fascinating organ than we thought it was, and if we want to keep it
looking good, we have to care for it as though it were our own.  One
approach is to undergo a painful surgical procedure wherein your skin
is turned inside-out, so the young cells are on the outside, but then
of course you have the unpleasant side effect that your insides
gradually fill up with dead old cells and you explode.  So this
procedure is pretty much limited to top Hollywood stars for whom
youthful beauty is a career necessity, such as Elizabeth Taylor and
Orson Welles.
		-- Dave Barry, "Saving Face"
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"...and the fully armed nuclear warheads, are, of course, merely a
courtesy detail."
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And this is a table ma'am.  What in essence it consists of is a
horizontal rectilinear plane surface maintained by four vertical
columnar supports, which we call legs.  The tables in this laboratory,
ma'am, are as advanced in design as one will find anywhere in the
world.
		-- Michael Frayn, "The Tin Men"
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	"And what will you do when you grow up to be as big as me?"
asked the father of his little son.
	"Diet."
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And yet, seasons must be taken with a grain of salt, for they too have
a sense of humor, as does history.  Corn stalks comedy, comedy stalks
tragedy, and this too is historic.  And yet, still, when corn meets
tragedy face to face, we have politics.
		-- Dalglish, Larsen and Sutherland, "Root Crops and
		   Ground Cover"
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Andrea: Unhappy the land that has no heroes.
Galileo: No, unhappy the land that _____needs heroes.
		-- Bertolt Brecht, "Life of Galileo"
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Angels we have heard on High
Tell us to go out and Buy.
		-- Tom Lehrer
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Ankh if you love Isis.
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Anoint, v.:
	To grease a king or other great functionary already
sufficiently slippery.
		-- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
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		Another Glitch in the Call
		------- ------ -- --- ----
	(Sung to the tune of a recent Pink Floyd song.)

We don't need no indirection
We don't need no flow control
No data typing or declarations
Did you leave the lists alone?

	Hey!  Hacker!  Leave those lists alone!

Chorus:
	All in all, it's just a pure-LISP function call.
	All in all, it's just a pure-LISP function call.
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Another good night not to sleep in a eucalyptus tree.
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Another possible source of guidance for teenagers is television, but
television's message has always been that the need for truth, wisdom
and world peace pales by comparison with the need for a toothpaste that
offers whiter teeth *___and* fresher breath.
		-- Dave Barry, "Kids Today: They Don't Know Dum Diddly
		   Do"
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		Answers to Last Fortune's Questions:

(1) None.  (Moses didn't have an ark).