fortunes

早期freebsd实现

!07/11 PDP a ni deppart m'I  !pleH
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(1) Alexander the Great was a great general.
(2) Great generals are forewarned.
(3) Forewarned is forearmed.
(4) Four is an even number.
(5) Four is certainly an odd number of arms for a man to have.
(6) The only number that is both even and odd is infinity.

Therefore, Alexander the Great had an infinite number of arms.
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(1) Everything depends.
(2) Nothing is always.
(3) Everything is sometimes.
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1.79 x 10^12 furlongs per fortnight -- it's not just a good idea, it's
the law!
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10.0 times 0.1 is hardly ever 1.0.
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100 buckets of bits on the bus	
100 buckets of bits
Take one down, short it to ground
FF buckets of bits on the bus	

FF buckets of bits on the bus	
FF buckets of bits
Take one down, short it to ground
FE buckets of bits on the bus	

ad infinitum...
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$100 invested at 7% interest for 100 years will become $100,000, at
which time it will be worth absolutely nothing.
		-- Lazarus Long, "Time Enough for Love"
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101 USES FOR A DEAD MICROPROCESSOR
	(1)  Scarecrow for centipedes
	(2)  Dead cat brush
	(3)  Hair barrettes
	(4)  Cleats
	(5)  Self-piercing earrings
	(6)  Fungus trellis
	(7)  False eyelashes
	(8)  Prosthetic dog claws
        .
        .
        .
	(99)  Window garden harrow (pulled behind Tonka tractors)
	(100) Killer velcro
	(101) Currency
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186,282 miles per second:

It isn't just a good idea, it's the law!
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2180, U.S. History question:
	What 20th Century U.S. President was almost impeached and what
office did he later hold?
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$3,000,000
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"355/113 -- Not the famous irrational number PI, but an incredible
simulation!"
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43rd Law of Computing:
	Anything that can go wr
fortune: Segmentation violation -- Core dumped
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77.  HO HUM -- The Redundant

------- (7)	This hexagram refers to a situation of extreme
--- --- (8)	boredom.  Your programs always bomb off.  Your wife
------- (7)	smells bad.  Your children have hives.  You are working
---O--- (6)	on an accounting system, when you want to develop the
---X--- (9)	GREAT AMERICAN COMPILER.  You give up hot dates to
--- --- (8)	nurse sick computers.  What you need now is sex.

Nine in the second place means:
	The yellow bird approaches the malt shop.  Misfortune.

Six in the third place means:
	In former times men built altars to honor the Internal Revenue
	Service.  Great Dragons!  Are you in trouble!
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7:30, Channel 5: The Bionic Dog (Action/Adventure)
	The Bionic Dog drinks too much and kicks over the National
	Redwood Forest.
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7:30, Channel 5: The Bionic Dog (Action/Adventure)
	The Bionic Dog gets a hormonal short-circuit and violates the
	Mann Act with an interstate Greyhound bus.
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99 blocks of crud on the disk,
99 blocks of crud!
You patch a bug, and dump it again:
100 blocks of crud on the disk!

100 blocks of crud on the disk,
100 blocks of crud!
You patch a bug, and dump it again:
101 blocks of crud on the disk! ...
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A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than a
"Yes" merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble.
		-- Mahatma Ghandi
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A [golf] ball hitting a tree shall be deemed not to have hit the tree.
Hitting a tree is simply bad luck and has no place in a scientific
game.  The player should estimate the distance the ball would have
traveled if it had not hit the tree and play the ball from there,
preferably atop a nice firm tuft of grass.
		-- Donald A. Metz
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A [golf] ball sliced or hooked into the rough shall be lifted and
placed in the fairway at a point equal to the distance it carried or
rolled into the rough.  Such veering right or left frequently results
from friction between the face of the club and the cover of the ball
and the player should not be penalized for the erratic behavior of the
ball resulting from such uncontrollable physical
phenomena.
		-- Donald A. Metz
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A baby is an alimentary canal with a loud voice at one end and no
responsibility at the other.
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A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on.
		-- Carl Sandburg
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A bachelor is a selfish, undeserving guy who has cheated some woman out
of a divorce.
		-- Don Quinn
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A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining
and wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
		-- Mark Twain
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A billion here, a couple of billion there -- first thing you know it
adds up to be real money.
		-- Senator Everett McKinley Dirksen
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A bird in the bush usually has a friend in there with him.
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A bird in the hand is worth what it will bring.
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A bird in the hand makes it awfully hard to blow your nose.
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... A booming voice says, "Wrong, cretin!", and you notice that you
have turned into a pile of dust.
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A bore is someone who persists in holding his own views after we have
enlightened him with ours.
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A budget is just a method of worrying before you spend money, as well
as afterward.
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A candidate is a person who gets money from the rich and votes from the
poor to protect them from each other.
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A celebrity is a person who is known for his well-knownness.
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A child can go only so far in life without potty training.  It is not
mere coincidence that six of the last seven presidents were potty
trained, not to mention nearly half of the nation's state legislators.
		-- Dave Barry
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A child of five could understand this!  Fetch me a child of five.
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A chubby man with a white beard and a red suit will approach you soon.
Avoid him.  He's a Commie.
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A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but
won't cross the street to vote in a national election.
		-- Bill Vaughan
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A city is a large community where people are lonesome together
		-- Herbert Prochnow
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A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody
wants to read.
		-- Mark Twain
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A closed mouth gathers no foot.
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A computer, to print out a fact,
Will divide, multiply, and subtract.
	But this output can be
	No more than debris,
If the input was short of exact.
		-- Gigo
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A conclusion is simply the place where someone got tired of thinking.
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A CONS is an object which cares.
		-- Bernie Greenberg.
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A consultant is a person who borrows your watch, tells you what time it
is, pockets the watch, and sends you a bill for it.
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A continuing flow of paper is sufficient to continue the flow of paper.
		-- Dyer
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A copy of the universe is not what is required of art; one of the
damned things is ample.
		-- Rebecca West
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A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats.
		-- Ben Franklin
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A crusader's wife slipped from the garrison
And had an affair with a Saracen.
	She was not oversexed,
	Or jealous or vexed,
She just wanted to make a comparison.
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A cynic is a person searching for an honest man, with a stolen
lantern.
		-- Edgar A. Shoaff
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A day for firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?
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A day without sunshine is like night.
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A diplomat is a man who can convince his wife she'd look stout in a fur
coat.
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A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that
you will look forward to the trip.
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	A disciple of another sect once came to Drescher as he was
eating his morning meal.  "I would like to give you this personality
test", said the outsider, "because I want you to be happy."
	Drescher took the paper that was offered him and put it into
the toaster -- "I wish the toaster to be happy too".
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A diva who specializes in risqu'e arias is an off-coloratura soprano ...
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	A doctor, an architect, and a computer scientist were arguing
about whose profession was the oldest.  In the course of their
arguments, they got all the way back to the Garden of Eden, whereupon
the doctor said, "The medical profession is clearly the oldest, because
Eve was made from Adam's rib, as the story goes, and that was a simply
incredible surgical feat."
	The architect did not agree.  He said, "But if you look at the
Garden itself, in the beginning there was chaos and void, and out of
that, the Garden and the world were created.  So God must have been an
architect."
	The computer scientist, who had listened to all of this said,
"Yes, but where do you think the chaos came from?"
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A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.
		-- Ogden Nash
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A dozen, a gross, and a score,
Plus three times the square root of four,
	Divided by seven,
	Plus five times eleven,
Equals nine squared plus zero, no more.
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A famous Lisp Hacker noticed an Undergraduate sitting in front of a
Xerox 1108, trying to edit a complex Klone network via a browser.
Wanting to help, the Hacker clicked one of the nodes in the network
with the mouse, and asked "what do you see?"  Very earnestly, the
Undergraduate replied "I see a cursor."  The Hacker then quickly
pressed the boot toggle at the back of the keyboard, while
simultaneously hitting the Undergraduate over the head with a thick
Interlisp Manual.  The Undergraduate was then Enlightened.
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A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the
subject.
		-- Winston Churchill
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A fool must now and then be right by chance.
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A fool's brain digests philosophy into folly, science into
superstition, and art into pedantry.  Hence University education.
		-- G. B. Shaw
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A fool-proof method for sculpting an elephant: first, get a huge block
of marble; then you chip away everything that doesn't look like an
elephant.
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A formal parsing algorithm should not always be used.
		-- D. Gries
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"A fractal is by definition a set for which the Hausdorff Besicovitch
dimension strictly exceeds the topological dimension."
		-- Mandelbrot, "The Fractal Geometry of Nature"
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A free society is one where it is safe to be unpopular.
		-- Adlai Stevenson
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A Galileo could no more be elected president of the United States than
he could be elected Pope of Rome.  Both high posts are reserved for men
favored by God with an extraordinary genius for swathing the bitter
facts of life in bandages of self-illusion.
		-- H. L. Mencken
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A general leading the State Department resembles  a dragon commanding
ducks.
		-- New York Times, Jan. 20, 1981
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A girl and a boy bump into each other -- surely an accident.
A girl and a boy bump and her handkerchief drops -- surely another accident.
But when a girl gives a boy a dead squid -- *____that ___had __to ____mean _________something*.
		-- S. Morganstern, "The Silent Gondoliers"
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A gleekzorp without a tornpee is like a quop without a fertsneet (sort
of).
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A good question is never answered.  It is not a bolt to be tightened
into place but a seed to be planted and to bear more seed toward the
hope of greening the landscape of idea.
		-- John Ciardi
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A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely
rearranging their prejudices.
		-- William James
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A great nation is any mob of people which produces at least one honest
man a century.
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A hypothetical paradox:
	What would happen in a battle between an Enterprise security
team, who always get killed soon after appearing, and a squad of
Imperial Stormtroopers, who can't hit the broad side of a planet?
		-- Tom Galloway
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A is for Amy who fell down the stairs, B is for Basil assaulted by bears.
C is for Clair who wasted away, D is for Desmond thrown out of the sleigh.
E is for Ernest who choked on a peach, F is for Fanny, sucked dry by a leech.
G is for George, smothered under a rug, H is for Hector, done in by a thug.
I is for Ida who drowned in the lake, J is for James who took lye, by mistake.
K is for Kate who was struck with an axe, L is for Leo who swallowed some tacks.
M is for Maud who was swept out to sea, N is for Nevil who died of enui.
O is for Olive, run through with an awl, P is for Prue, trampled flat in a brawl
Q is for Quinton who sank in a mire, R is for Rhoda, consumed by a fire.
S is for Susan who parished of fits, T is for Titas who flew into bits.
U is for Una  who slipped down a drain, V is for Victor, squashed under a train.
W is for Winie, embedded in ice, X is for Xercies, devoured by mice.
Y is for Yoric whose head was bashed in, Z is for Zilla who drank too much gin.
		-- Edward Gorey "The Gastly Crumb Tines"
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A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
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A jury consists of 12 persons chosen to decide
who has the better lawyer.
		-- Robert Frost
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A lack of leadership is no substitute for inaction.
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A lack of leadership is no substitute for inaction.
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A lack of leadership is no substitute for inaction.
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A lady with one of her ears applied
To an open keyhole heard, inside,
Two female gossips in converse free --
The subject engaging them was she.
"I think", said one, "and my husband thinks
That she's a prying, inquisitive minx!"
As soon as no more of it she could hear