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First year in College
=====================
program Hello(input, output)
  begin
    writeln('Hello World')
  end.

Senior year in College
======================
(defun hello
  (print
    (cons 'Hello (list 'World))))

New professional
================
#include 
void main(void)
{
  char *message[] = {"Hello ", "World"};
  int i;

  for(i = 0; i 
#include 

class string
{
private:
  int size;
  char *ptr;

public:
  string() : size(0), ptr(new char('\0')) {}
  string(const string &s) : size(s.size)
  {
    ptr = new char[size + 1];
    strcpy(ptr, s.ptr);
  }
~string()
  {
    delete [] ptr;
  }
  friend ostream &operator );
    importheader();
    importheader();
    importheader("pshlo.h");
    importheader("shlo.hxx");
    importheader("mycls.hxx");

    // needed typelibs
    importlib("actimp.tlb");
    importlib("actexp.tlb");
    importlib("thlo.tlb");

    [
    uuid(2573F891-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820),
    aggregatable
    ]
    coclass CHello
        {
        cotype THello;
        };
};
 
#include "ipfix.hxx"

extern HANDLE hEvent;

class CHello : public CHelloBase
{
public:
    IPFIX(CLSID_CHello);

    CHello(IUnknown *pUnk);
    ~CHello();

    HRESULT  __stdcall  PrintSz(LPWSTR pwszString);

private:
    static int cObjRef;
};


#include 
#include 
#include 
#include 
#include "thlo.h"
#include "pshlo.h"
#include "shlo.hxx"
#include "mycls.hxx"

int CHello::cObjRef = 0;

CHello::CHello(IUnknown *pUnk) : CHelloBase(pUnk)
{
    cObjRef++;
    return;
}

HRESULT  __stdcall  CHello::PrintSz(LPWSTR pwszString)
{
    printf("%ws\n", pwszString);
    return(ResultFromScode(S_OK));
}

CHello::~CHello(void)
{

// when the object count goes to zero, stop the server
cObjRef--;
if( cObjRef == 0 )
    PulseEvent(hEvent);
return;
}
 
#include 
#include 
#include "pshlo.h"
#include "shlo.hxx"
#include "mycls.hxx"

HANDLE hEvent;

int _cdecl main( int argc,char * argv[]) {

ULONG ulRef;
DWORD dwRegistration;
CHelloCF *pCF = new CHelloCF();
hEvent = CreateEvent(NULL, FALSE, FALSE, NULL);

// Initialize the OLE libraries
CoInitializeEx(NULL, COINIT_MULTITHREADED);

CoRegisterClassObject(CLSID_CHello, pCF, CLSCTX_LOCAL_SERVER,
                  REGCLS_MULTIPLEUSE, &dwRegistration);

// wait on an event to stop
WaitForSingleObject(hEvent, INFINITE);

//      revoke and release the class object
CoRevokeClassObject(dwRegistration);
ulRef = pCF->Release();

// Tell OLE we are going away.
CoUninitialize();

return(0);
}

extern CLSID CLSID_CHello;
extern UUID LIBID_CHelloLib;

CLSID CLSID_CHello = { /* 2573F891-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820 */
    0x2573F891,
    0xCFEE,
    0x101A,
    { 0x9A, 0x9F, 0x00, 0xAA, 0x00, 0x34, 0x28, 0x20 }
};

UUID LIBID_CHelloLib = { /* 2573F890-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820 */
    0x2573F890,
    0xCFEE,
    0x101A,
    { 0x9A, 0x9F, 0x00, 0xAA, 0x00, 0x34, 0x28, 0x20 }
};

 
#include 
#include 
#include 
#include 
#include 
#include "pshlo.h"
#include "shlo.hxx"
#include "clsid.h"

int _cdecl main(
int argc,
char * argv[]
) {
HRESULT         hRslt;
IHello         *pHello;
ULONG           ulCnt;
IMoniker *      pmk;
WCHAR           wcsT[_MAX_PATH];
WCHAR           wcsPath[2 * _MAX_PATH];

// get object path
wcsPath[0] = '\0';
wcsT[0] = '\0';
if( argc > 1) {
    mbstowcs(wcsPath, argv[1], strlen(argv[1]) + 1);
    wcsupr(wcsPath);
    }
else {
    fprintf(stderr, "Object path must be specified\n");
    return(1);
    }

// get print string
if(argc > 2)
    mbstowcs(wcsT, argv[2], strlen(argv[2]) + 1);
else
    wcscpy(wcsT, L"Hello World");

printf("Linking to object %ws\n", wcsPath);
printf("Text String %ws\n", wcsT);

// Initialize the OLE libraries
hRslt = CoInitializeEx(NULL, COINIT_MULTITHREADED);

 
if(SUCCEEDED(hRslt)) {

    hRslt = CreateFileMoniker(wcsPath, &pmk);
    if(SUCCEEDED(hRslt))
        hRslt = BindMoniker(pmk, 0, IID_IHello, (void **)&pHello);

    if(SUCCEEDED(hRslt)) {

        // print a string out
        pHello->PrintSz(wcsT);

        Sleep(2000);
        ulCnt = pHello->Release();
        }
    else
        printf("Failure to connect, status: %lx", hRslt);

    // Tell OLE we are going away.
    CoUninitialize();
    }

return(0);
}


Enlightened Master Programmer
=============================
10 PRINT "HELLO WORLD"
20 END


</pre></BLOCKQUOTE><HR>

<B>Submitted by:</B> Anonymous<BR>
<B>Submitted on:</B> Wednesday, April 8, 1998 at 14:48:14<BR>
<BLOCKQUOTE><pre>On Thu, 02 Apr 1998 13:10:08 -0600, Andrew Thomas-Cramer
 wrote:

The primary graphic of a recent Microsoft ad is a light socket without a
light bulb.

The bulbless socket occupies the right-hand page; the left-hand page
begins "It's no secret some of our best ideas have come from recognizing 
those of others." [See the ad in the magazine "Software Development," 
pp. 12-13, April 1998.]


The meaning intended for the graphic escapes me. Here are some I've
considered.

* The light bulb, a metaphor for an idea, is missing because Microsoft
stole it.
* Microsoft is a dim bulb -- so dim you can't see it.
* Microsoft marketing says: Only the dull and ignorant can't see the
bulb.
* The bulb is an add-on feature.
* The bulb should only take a few more days to install -- it's
Plug-and-Play.
* The bulb is still under development. Microsoft hasn't yet determined
how to make 
  it incompatible with other vendors' sockets.
* It's being replaced -- it turned blue again.
* To counter its image as an unstoppable fungus, Microsoft is
intentionally generating 
  FUD about itself: "We can't afford light bulbs."
* Microsoft's lighting system doesn't support light bulbs, but your
company won't let you 
  buy other vendors' systems that actually provide light.

    
    </pre></BLOCKQUOTE><HR>

<B>Submitted by:</B> The Gremlin<BR>
<B>Submitted on:</B> Tuesday, April 7, 1998 at 12:25:51<BR>
<BLOCKQUOTE><pre>True Story:

When I was in college, studying CS, I had a friend that was studying Biology. One day, she asked me what does "RAM" means. I told her that "Random Access Memory". And she said: "Does that mean that when you look for something in that memory you don't know if you're going to find it?".


    </pre></BLOCKQUOTE><HR>

<B>Submitted by:</B> Arun Prakash Gupta<BR>
<B>Submitted on:</B> Tuesday, April 7, 1998 at 06:53:53<BR>
<BLOCKQUOTE><pre>NEVER  LOVE A  PROGRAMMER

Now that I've lived to see this day,
These are the things I must but say.

Die a bachelor, if your options're few,
Never ever love a programmer, they'll make a program out of you.

Don't laugh it away, mine has been an object lesson,
They find syntax errors, even in a romantic expression.

Alas! they search logic in love, where there is none,
Yo heart may skip a beat and they just hit return.

You are in for trouble if you persist,
You'll just be a pointer in a long linked list.

They would never oblige you even with a smile,

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